What does 'respect' look like?

16th July 2025

We’ve previously published blogs explaining why it is essential that those in public life, including councillors and members of devolved public bodies, behave with courtesy and respect. This is important not only to help ensure public confidence in them as individuals, but also in their roles and the organisations they represent. We’ve also explained why a failure to so behave can have a significant detrimental impact on both the standards of public debate and on the culture and working relationships within public organisations (which in turn impacts upon the provision of public services).

But what do we mean by courtesy and respect? What do they look like?

Respect is the demonstration of due regard for the feelings, wishes, opinions or rights of others. Courtesy is showing politeness towards others, both in terms of attitude and behaviour.

So, does the requirement to behave with courtesy and respect mean those in public life should always try to agree with each other and can’t challenge each other’s views, actions and decisions? Does it mean councillors and members can’t scrutinise the performance of council officers and public body employees, and hold them to account for the performance of the organisation and the provision of its services?

Well, no.

Behaving with courtesy and respect does not mean agreeing with others. Robust debate and scrutiny are essential components of a successful democracy. How public funds should be spent and on what, and what the priorities of councils and public bodies should be, are emotive and sensitive topics. Given the importance of issues being discussed at a local authority or public body level, be it healthcare, education or housing, it is natural for people to feel strongly and even passionately about them. 

If decisions are made without different views and perspectives being aired and challenges made, there is a risk that possible alternative options or potential consequences will not be fully considered. Ensuring diversity of debate helps challenge assumptions, and decisions made after balanced debates are more likely to be both inclusive and effective.

Councillors and board members can show courtesy and respect by:

• being polite;
• using appropriate language;
• allowing others time to speak and respond;
• listening and paying attention to others, and recognising their contributions even if they disagree with what has been said;
• having consideration for other people’s feelings;
• following protocols, rules and Standing Orders;
• showing appreciation and thanks; and
• being thoughtful.

Demonstrating courtesy and respect encourages open and constructive debate and can help reduce polarisation as, when people feel heard, they are more likely to listen to and at least consider alternative views.

A key aspect of being respectful, in the context of fostering open and constructive debate and discussions, is for councillors and members to focus any challenge on the ideas and policies of others, as opposed to making personal attacks. Personal insults and attacks on the characteristics of others, such as how they look or speak, is unnecessary. Not only can it cause upset, frustration and division; it also leads to a lack of focus, and reduces the time spent on the important issues that need to be considered. It also helps promote effective public debate, as constructive challenge and criticism of performance, ideas and policies requires an element of logic, clarity and rationality that name-calling and the use of profanities or other inappropriate language does not.

Seeing councillors and members be respectful and courteous gives the public confidence they are focused on undertaking their roles in the public interest, rather than on attacking or demeaning others in order to try to score political points or promote themselves. Being respectful and courteous also demonstrates to the public that councillors and board are professional and deserving of their positions as leaders.